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January 30 2018




if you an adult learn to take sex criticism. Y'all be 26 giving out wack head cause you refused to listen in ya freshmen year of college that you not suppose to bite it like that. You 28 still just sticking dry penis in a dry hole saying “oh..you tight” NOT AROUSED!!!

if someone says ow during sex you stop and ask! Don’t keep going!!

If you finished first that’s fine!!! It’s normal!! But don’t just leave that person hanging!!

You cum in a person after they asked you not too but it was an accident guess who paying $50 for plan b?? YOU!!!

if you looking at this putting genders on it then it’s ya fault lol cause this is the most gender neutral post

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Some magical nerd.




frodo and sam’s love for each other is literally the only thing keeping middle earth from just spontaneously combusting

No, but like, that’s literally it. Gandalf straight-up says to Elrond this Quest can’t succeed by force or wisdom, but by friendship. If Frodo and Sam hate each other even a little, Middle-Earth is doomed.

And it gets more terrifying when you realize that one of the strongest powers of the Ring is to turn people against each other, and that even if it didn’t, the Ring and the Quest still put Frodo in a psychological state where he can barely keep himself sane, let alone love anyone or anything other than the Ring. In fact, I’m fairly sure the Ring tried to persuade Frodo to kill Sam far more often than the books shows - the Ring tends to encourage murder, from what we see. Instead of listening to the Ring, Frodo somehow manages to keep in the back of his mind that he can trust Sam more than he can trust himself, and I have no idea how Frodo can resist the temptation to think his trust is misplaced.

And sure, one could say, “Oh, but Sam has to understand it, so it’s not all that bad” but you have to remember Sam is a plain, non-Tookish hobbit with no inclination or skills for adventuring around and yet he has to become the entire Fellowship. Name one thing the Fellowship did for Frodo that Sam doesn’t also do. He has to advise, guide and protect him as well as keep his hope alive and remind him of who he is. The amount of pressure he’s under is incredible, and unlike, say, Aragorn, he has no experience to draw from. Plus, Merry and Pippin tend to rely on each other, while Frodo relies on Sam, but Sam himself hardly seems to have anyone to turn to for strength. I’m not saying Frodo doesn’t support him as well as he’s able - actually, Frodo is remarkably consistent about taking care of Sam from Book I to Book VI. But what Frodo is capable to offer (see the paragraph above) is far from being all that Sam needs. And actually, in the last stages of the Quest, Sam is basically living a one-sided relationship under the worst possible conditions, and that his devotion doesn’t even waver despite that just blows my mind.

That the Quest was successful is one of the most incredible and beautiful things that Tolkien wrote. Frodo and Sam walked straight into the Land where no love can exist and managed to become closer to each other than they had been. It’s the biggest fuck you Sauron probably ever got. No, seriously. Frodo and Sam beat a Maia basically by cuddling a lot and talking about food. Like, what the fuck??? I mean, if I told you someone could write a 1000 pages novel in which a pacifist and his gardener beat a minor god via supporting each other emotionally, would you believe me? 

It’s classic Tolkien: the surprise element (i.e. flawed creatures can be incredibly noble even under unspeakable distress) might overcome even the most carefully thought out plots devised by powerful evil lords. (See also: the entire Silmarillion, pretty much.)

“A pacifist and his gardener beat a minor god via supporting each other emotionally” I would read 50 books with this premise. I don’t love all 1,000 pages, but this is the heart that keeps me rereading

welcome to my history channel show, People Are Smart And Shit’s Not That Hard.


today’s topic is, “why is everything pyramid shaped?” we have with us a guy who drinks bongwater –

dr redeye: aliens!

– and a guy who builds shit for a living.

union local: dude, did you ever make a pile of anything in your life?

dr redeye: *starts laughing*

union local: besides poop.

dr redeye: *begins to look concerned*

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casual teen titans + wonder woman. art by picolo 

When the bard uses intimidate










When they roll a 20:

When they roll a 1:

never not reblog the angry dooting=_=

When the enemy is a better bard than you


no idea wtf is happening in that last gif but you really gotta respect the level of raw commitment they’re displaying here

I feel like you’d be even more confused to learn they’re aggressively singing “Like a Virgin” at each other in that last one.

God, I love Moulin Rouge. 

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Happy birthday, Harriet Tubman

(29th Jan 1822 - 10th Mar 1913)

She freed thousands of enslaved people.
A freedom fighter, matriarch, a guiding light.

Sinister sound of Tyrannosaurus Rex heard for first time in 66 million years






The fearsome roar of Tyrannosaurus Rex as portrayed in film has left many a cinema-goer quaking in their seat.

But new research suggests the king of the dinosaurs made a far more sinister sound.

For a new BBC documentary, naturalist Chris Packham visited Julia Clarke, professor of Vertebrate Palaeontology at the University of Texas, to test out a the theory that dinosaurs actually sounded more like birds and reptiles, than today’s predatory mammals. - Source

reblogging for later!

Okay, yeah, that is scary as FUCK, oh my god.

Oh yeah, that’s a sound that’ll haunt me. I mean they admit their science is far from conclusive, but that sound… yeah, if I heard that in an alley I’d start running like fuck.

https://youtu.be/cpipaUfcnmM you have to use headphones though otherwise you won’t be able to hear it, even with your sound turned way up

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(photos by Bill Watterson and an octopus)

I think this is the best scientist photograph I have ever seen.

But people didn’t believe him on reddit. So Watterson made the photo sequence into a gif.




Well I’m a millennial so my retirement plan is societal collapse

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These kinds of responses are my FAVORITE. Some examples to answers to this question I have heard:


“Okay, and who’s the president?”

“Obama, no wait, shit *vehemently* fuck, I hate him… what’s his name…”

“It’s okay, you know who he is.”


“Who’s the president?”

“*drunkenly angry and confused* ..uhhhhhhh…Orange… damn it what’s the fuck’s name….

“Yup, good enough.”


“And who’s the president,”

“Not fuckin’ Obama!”

“I feel ya.”


“Who’s the president- wait, nevermind you’re from Korea you said, right? So who’s-“

“Everybody knows that Trump-bitch.”

“Oh, well, alright then.”

5. (My personal favorite)

“Who’s the president?”


“Good enough.”

My roommate is a neurologist and has to do this check all the time. Her all-time favorite so far has been “ay dios mio” during which the woman was vigorously crossing herself.

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I’ve been told by more than a few people that I’m “a lot”.

January 12 2018


Me: I should save the Gildergreen quest for later, when I’m at a higher level.

Lucia, my beloved daughter: That big tree in the park looks so sad… I feel sorry for it.



My favorite plottwist in Skyrim is when you ask Serana how she feels about her vampirism and if she’d turn back if she could and you’re fully expecting the classic sob story “Oh it’s terrible the sun hurts my eyes and I’m constantly having to wear eyeliner what a curse it is to be a creature of the night” but instead she’s just
“Oh it’s pretty chill.” 

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The College of Winterhold questline in a nutshell

January 11 2018

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I was playing Skyrim and I think I just found the summary of Dragon Age 2.



the life expectancy of russians in 1897 was 28 years old & half of children died before 5 years old bitch no wonder nihilism was so prominent

if i currently had more dead siblings than living & only 7 more years left to live you bet your ass i would be blowing up the tsar


no sideblogs, we chaotically cram our personal posts, aesthetic posts, and 800 hyperfixations into one blog like men

August 15 2017


The floor is bi women and lesbians defending and uplifting each other

July 31 2017

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Mojito The Therapy Dog And Skywalker The Deaf Kitten

Best friends!

Photos by ©mojito_rose

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